Tuesday 1 June 2010
Interfaith Marriages
Children have the right to be brought up in an Islamic environment by good Muslim parents. So Muslim men in the West should think carefully before marrying outside the faith.
Muslim men and women are told to seek faithful spouses with a strong, good belief, and not allow non-Muslim standards of selection influence them. Muslim men can marry only Muslim, Christian, or Jewish chaste women, while Muslim women can marry only chaste Muslim men.
Allah (s.w.t.) said:
This day are (all) good things made lawful for you. The food of those who have received the Scripture is lawful for you, and your food is lawful for them. And so are the virtuous women of the believers and the virtuous women of those who have received the Scripture before you (lawful for you) when you give them their marriage portions and live with them in honor, not in fornication, nor taking them as secret concubines. Whoso denies the faith, his work is vain and he will be among the losers in the Hereafter. [Qur'an: Al-Ma'idah (5:5)].
A Muslim man is discouraged from marrying a non-Muslim woman if there is no Islamic State or if he is not living in an existing Islamic state, since the non-Islamic states do not recognize his rights as head of the family to raise the children Islamically. On the contrary, the children will most likely be brought up in their mother's religion, since the Muslim husband does not have his Islamic rights in his non-Muslim wife's country.
There are many tragic examples of Muslim men who tried to take their children to their Muslim countries after they divorced non-Muslim wives. The women in many of these cases succeeded in bringing the children back to be raised in the non-Islamic societies as non-Muslims. The fathers are referred to as kidnappers (of their own children) in the non-Islamic media. Unfortunately, even the governments in Muslim countries these days help the non-Muslim wives to get custody of the children. This is due to the absence of an Islamic state which would protect Muslim children from being kidnapped by non-Muslim wives to be raised as non-Muslims.
Muslim men should consider these issues before they marry non-Muslim women, especially when the man is strongly influenced by her physical appearance. A Muslim man should look to the future and consider his duties toward his children. The cases mentioned show clearly the damage that can be done to children in interfaith marriages, and while a personal sin may be easy to forget and repent from, one may never overcome the problems that arise because his children were raised as non-Muslims as a result of his negligence concerning providing the right spouse and community for them. Children have the right to be brought up in an Islamic environment by good Muslim parents.
The benefits of marrying a non-Muslim woman are minimal when both live in a non-Islamic state. The woman and her relatives would not see how Muslims live as a community, nor would they have close contact with family, should the Muslim man decide to marry her and live outside the Islamic State. Marrying a chaste Christian or Jewish woman in a non-Islamic state should be considered as a last resort and as the only alternative to keep him from falling into adultery. Men, however, should be aware of the fact that most women in non-Islamic societies do not qualify as chaste women in Islam, (i.e. abstention from unlawful sexual activities). Some Muslim men ignore these conditions and ignore the commands of Allah when they are misled and fooled by a smile from a non-Muslim woman.
Abdullah Ibn `Abbas, a famous companion of the Prophet (s.a.w.) and a famous scholar, said that Muslim men should not marry Christian or Jewish women from people who are enemies of Islam.
Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradhawi, a contemporary Muslim scholar, said that the Christian or Jewish women can be married only if the four conditions summarized below are satisfied:
She must be Kitabiyyah, i.e. Christian or Jewish by faith, and not by virtue of birth into a Christian or Jewish family. Many women who live in Christian or Jewish societies today are atheists, Buddhists or Bahai's. These women are prohibited for Muslim men. A woman who commits apostasy, by becoming a non-Muslim after being a Muslim, would not be allowed to marry a Muslim man, since apostasy is much worse than unbelief.
She must be Muhsanah, which means chaste and virtuous. Women who are involved in illicit relationships with men are prohibited for Muslim men. Most non-Muslim women these days do not qualify as Muhsanat (chaste and virtuous women who abstain from sexual activities outside marriage), and Muslim men should fear Allah and keep this condition in mind.
The woman should not be from people who are fighting Islam or are helping others to fight Islam.
There should be no threat or possible harm from marrying her. For example, if a man's children would not be raised as Muslims, he should not marry her. If the courts in a non-Islamic society would give the children to her in the case of divorce, then he cannot marry her, unless she agrees that he would have the children in the case of divorce.
Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradhawi also said that Muslim men may not marry Christian or Jewish women if the Muslim community is a small minority in a huge non-Muslim society, and such marriages would make it impossible for Muslim women to find Muslim men to marry. This is classified under "limiting the allowed" in the Islamic jurisprudence. Dr. Yusuf Al-Qaradhawi used the example that if all people grew cotton instead of wheat, the government would have the right to stop them from doing so, since wheat is a necessary food ingredient, even though growing cotton is allowed in normal cases.
Non-Muslim women who repent and accept Islam are treated as any other Muslim if their acceptance of Islam is sincere and not merely for the purpose of marrying Muslim men. Islam forgives all that was before it. Some people, however, accept Islam by name only to marry a Muslim, without showing the least change in their lifestyles to prove that they are following Islam. One should not marry from such people.
There are many Muslim girls of a marriageable age who are living in non-Islamic countries, and it is the duty of the Muslim men to protect these girls from marrying non-Muslim men, which is absolutely prohibited in Islam. If Muslim men loosely practice their right to marry Christian or Jewish women, the Muslims girls in non-Islamic societies will be forced into unwanted circumstances and Muslim men will be at least partially responsible and will get their share of the punishment from Allah.
In considering marriage to a non-Muslim woman a man should remember that marriage is more than the private marital relationship. A good Muslim woman would provide her husband with total security, comfort, trust, tranquility, and happiness, and would raise the children as good Muslims. A man would not have to see his children taken to a church every Sunday without being able to prevent it or live with the concern that his wife would teach his children un-Islamic traditions. It is much easier to trust a Muslim woman than to trust a non-Muslim woman who does not fear Allah, and know that He is watching her all the time. And certainly a woman who does not fear Allah, who sees and knows everything, will not fear or obey her husband who is only home in the evenings.
Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said:
A woman is chosen as a wife for her wealth, beauty, family, and faith. Win the one that has the faith or you would ruin your life. (Bukhari and Muslim).
The following verse from the Qur'an beautifully gives us the guidelines for selecting the right wife:
Allah (s.w.t.) said:
Do not marry unbelieving women until they believe; a slave woman who believes is better than a free woman who does not believe, even though the latter may appear very attractive to you. Al-Qur'an: Al-Baqarah (2:221)
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17 comments:
so strong great article
i am sure that many muslim men don't know the details
(conditions )to marry non muslim women . as you said
Yassin, man is strongly influenced by her physical
appearance and not care about her manners .she is Good
or not .will she be good mother to his CHILDREN ?
Wake up muslim men and it's better for you to marry
muslim woman .wake up brothers
Mashaallah Brother Yassin .
Your post so Great . I always forward your posts to
my muslims and non muslims friends . jazak allah
khayran .
God bless you
Beautiful post as usual
i agree with everything you said Yassin in that
Blog .Don't know why men choose dirt and leave the
Good for them . i have a muslim man chosed to marry
non muslim woman . she is so bad in all meaning
Drink all day and night and one day he came
early from his job to find her have sex with
another man .believe what happened to him cause
he screamed and pushed her away ?
he kicked out from her country (usa) and his
kids took from him and now raise as christians
all that happened cause his stupid choice to
marry bad non muslim.
I see you did not have the courage to publish my post. Is Islam about sensorship as well? It seems you are scared of debate and only want to hear, what you want to hear. Here it is again, should you decide to 'stand up' as a Muslim man.
As a non Muslim woman I find this article both disturbing and relieving at the same time. Relieving only because it encourages the prevention of interfaith marriages and thus saving non Muslim women from a religion that, judging from the above, incites intolerance.
I find it disgusting, that the words ‘girl’ and ‘marriageable’ can be found in the same sentence.
I find it very believable, that the words ‘slave’ and ‘marry’ are found in the same sentence.
I found it hilarious, that while reading this article, about chastity and a religion that seems to be basically a list of endless rules, that an unclothed woman was inviting me to a fantasy game, in the advertising panel on the right hand side of this blog. Not to mention, the invitation to the ‘Be Naughty’ website.
And Tracey
‘as you said Yassin, man is strongly influenced by her physical appearance and not care about her manners . ‘
If a man, a potential husband, is that shallow and stupid, he is not worth marrying anyway, Muslim or non Muslim.
Anonymous you are so funny to think in that way .
I didn’t see your previous comments .I just saw your only comment
Ok Let me ask you that Question
If you have the courge and i don’t have as you said so why you don’t post
your comments with your Account not as Anonymous !! that’s First
Second I only don’t approve comments from people always insult.
If you insult you go hell .
Ok that that article not disturbing cause if you are good non muslim
(christian or jew) woman and loved muslim man .. no problem
But if you are that kind of non muslim women who drink day and night and
had sex before marriage ..you are forbidden to marry muslim man .
God so fair and choose the good for all people.
So if you are good non muslim you won’t get that feelings disturb feelings .
Is islam a religion of tolerance and peace and you can search here about that word “tolerance”To find your answer.
As you asked me ..i want ask you too..what you call that ?
Let’s read what that non muslim said :-
“I’ll tell you this — if you do build a mosque, I hope somebody blows it up. I hope the mosque isn’t built, and if it is, I hope it’s blown up.”
Is that your tolerance Anonymous ?
Is killing millions muslims Every year by your people tolerance ?
Is killing unarmed people by your people tolerance ?
it’s Inciting Intolerance
“who has glass house don’t throw people with stones “ Am i right ?
“I find it disgusting, that the words ‘girl’ and ‘marriageable’ can be found in the same sentence.”
Why you didn’t read the whole sentence ..or you non muslims always take what you want and delete and ignore the main sentence which always carry the truth . let ‘s look what’s make Anonymous feel disgustin!!
I said “There are many Muslim girls of a marriageable age”
Girls reached the age of marry is there any thing Wrong Anonymous ?
Anonymous Said:
“”I find it very believable, that the words ‘slave’ and ‘marry’ are found in the same sentence.”
First, it is important to know that thousands of years ago life was different than today. Today, people wouldn't accept slavery for any reason. The reason for this is because people are a lot more independent both financially, education wise, mentally, etc... But people back then were different. When a tribe or a group of people lose a major battle and their money is mostly, if not all, is taken as war booty by the other side, then people could and would accept being slaves for the following reasons:
1- Both financial and social security. When their country or tribe lost the war, they also lost most or all of their money as war booty. Being out of money and food, it becomes necessary for an individual to find the means for basic survival in life. Living as a slave would provide this.
2- Protection from hostile individuals. Even under the Islamic rule, you can still find hostile individuals who violate the Law and take matters into their own hands. An enemy family can be sometime in danger if they don't have a "protector".
3- Widows, Orphans, and the extremely poor of the enemy side need the financial and social protection from a Master. Back then, there were no governments with good social system that protects everyone. Slavery back then was that social system in special cases.
There are probably more points I can add, but I think these are sufficient enough.
Islam is a religion that came to fight slavery and end it once and for all. During Judaism and Christianity, slavery was at its highest peak in the Middle East. People were enslaved and they and their children were inherited and passed down to generations for ever. This tradition came from Leviticus 25:44-46 in the Bible's Old Testament, and further continued in the New Testament in 1 Timothy 6:1, 1 Peter 2:18, and Colossians 3:22.
Now keep in mind that the entire Bible is corrupted and unreliable and is mostly filled with man-made cultural laws and corruption!
GOD Almighty Said: "`How can you say, "We [the Jews] are wise, for we have the law of the LORD," when actually the lying pen of the scribes has handled it falsely?' (From the NIV Bible, Jeremiah 8:8)"
The Revised Standard Version makes it even clearer: "How can you say, 'We are wise, and the law of the LORD is with us'? But, behold, the false pen of the scribes has made it into a lie. (From the RSV Bible, Jeremiah 8:8)"
In either translation, we clearly see that the Jews had so much corrupted the Bible with their man-made cultural laws, that they had turned the Bible into a lie!
See Also Deuteronomy 31:25-29 where Moses peace be upon him predicted the corruption/tampering of the Law (Bible) after his death. The Book of Moses predicted that the Law (Bible) will get corrupted. The Book of Jeremiah which came approximately 826 years after did indeed confirm this corruption.
So Leviticus 25:44-46, 1 Timothy 6:1, 1 Peter 2:18, and Colossians 3:22 above are highly doubtful to be Divine Revelations from GOD Almighty, the Most Just, Most Merciful, and Most Wise.
When Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him received the Divine Revelations of Islam, slavery among the Pagan Arabs, Jews and Christians was quite common.
When he came with Allah Almighty's True Religion of Islam, he gradually eliminated slavery. He couldn't enforce it all at once, because it would've caused Islam to be an unsuccessful religion toward freeing slaves, and would certainly have broken Islam's system for ending slavery.
By gradually freeing slaves and making it be acceptable to the society of many different pagan cultures and traditions, the idea of eliminating slavery became powerful enough that after Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him died, the freed slaves remained free and non of them was ever enslaved again.
Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said:
Narrated Abu Musa Al-Ash'ari: "The Prophet said, "Give food to the hungry, pay a visit to the sick and release (set free) the one in captivity (by paying his ransom)." (Translation of Sahih Bukhari, Food, Meals, Volume 7, Book 65, Number 286)"
Always remember!
It was not Islam that started slavery, but it was Islam that ultimately ended it.
by the way , thanks for telling me about that ads .i will not deal again with any non muslim ads company which always not announce but porn and sex Article . I changed that company with an islamic company ads..you won’t see that bad ads again only pure islamic ads ..sorry for that mistake ..Are you happy now ..Smile .
Take care Anonymous
mashaallah Great Answer my Brother in islam
Yassin, I will try to keep this short and honest.
My comment was not intended to be insulting, however, I found your whole post insulting. Obviously we have extreme opposite views.
As a non Mulsim, I do not condemn someone to hell if they insult me. I don’t need to. They will be judged accordingly. I find that remark very childish, or is actually part of the teachings of Islam? That was a serious question, I have no idea about the teachings of Islam.
I do not want to marry a Muslim man, now or in the future, I have been happily married for 30 years and intend to stay that way until death. My feelings of ‘disturbing’ as you call it, do not come from guilt, I have nothing to feel guilty about. The whole concept in your post was disturbing…to me.
In reference to what some non Muslim said – this is one case and as far as I am concerned, there are idiots in every society, religion and country.
I find the use of the word ‘girl’ offensive because in many Muslim countries very young girls are sold or tricked into marriage. You cannot deny this, it is well documented. Surely that cannot be the intentions of Islam?
Slavery - I understand that the Qur’an has references to a time, now long ago, as does the Bible…why isn’t it updated? Should you be using those references to make a point that is relevant in today’s world?
I really don’t care who started slavery, the important thing is the future, that it slavery be abolished, as should intolerance, prejudice and inequality for ALL men and women of every religion. This is probably why your post upset me so much.
How would you feel if Muslim Men were put on the bottom of the list as far as being eligible marriage material?
Anyway, thank you for replying, I had my doubts for a while. I will leave you to your religion, I don’t think I will ever understand it.
PS. The world can keep dividing and eventually self destruct or it can come together to understand one another. Positive thoughts and preachings are much more constructive...don't you think?
Is my whole Answer insulting ?
Wiat Wait ..I will ask all people here if that right or not then continue Answer you Question ..Please muslim and non muslim here if i ansult write
insult ..if not write not insult ..
i will not accept any comments till i got the answer to that Question only write insult or not insult .that will be open for a day then i will answer her Questions ok people ..let’s Answer that simple Question .
i am not muslim but you Yassin didn't insult
your answer was so clear and strong .
and her Answer so lame . she didn't refute any
of Answer but Asked new Questions which make
her not in good situation .
Take care Yassin
you didn't insult Yassin ..she insulted islam and muslims by saying ""saving non Muslim women from a religion that, judging from the above, incites intolerance.""
You and your religion above, incites intolerance
islam is the religion of love ,mercy and tolerance.you shouldn't Yassin Approve her comments .
Great Answer my Brother in islam
you didn't insult .she insulted us and islam.
take it easy Yassin it’s non muslims way when they want to leave the debate.Always said lies like that funny lie that you insult or they always say
you have not open mind or God want that .we sick thier ill answers .
take care my precious brother in islam .
What’s your feelings now Anonymous and all in that Blog muslims and non muslims said that i didn’t insult and confirmed that you who insulted .
In all my debate christian always say that words
If you insult you go hell . i think they ment as i ment if you insult you will kicked out from the board .got it.
The teachings of Islam is : God the most merciful forgive all sins but associates partners (idols or humans or any other creations) with Him.
Really i am so happy for you .we muslims love the good for all .
By the way you Answered your question but in different subject ..ok i will write your Answer ander your question .
You asked :
“in many Muslim countries very young girls are sold or tricked into marriage. You cannot deny this, it is well documented. Surely that cannot be the intentions of Islam?”
Your Answer
this is one case, there are idiots in every society, religion and country
and ..let me add to your answer .I can deny most of fabricated stories
Which only try to Distort the image of the most beautiful muslim women
Muslim woman can’t be forced into marriage in Islam.
Let us look at what Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said regarding this issue:
Abu Huraira (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as having said: "A woman without a husband (or divorced or a widow) must not be married until she is consulted, and a virgin must not be married until her permission is sought. They asked the Prophet of Allah (may peace be upon him): How her (virgin's) consent can be solicited? He (the Holy Prophet) said: That she keeps silence. (Translation of Sahih Muslim, The Book of Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 008, Number 3303)"
Narrated AbuHurayrah: "The Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) said: An orphan virgin girl should be consulted about herself; if she says nothing that indicates her permission, but if she refuses, the authority of the guardian cannot be exercised against her will. (Translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud, Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 11, Number 2088)"
Narrated Abdullah ibn Umar: "The Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) said: Consult women about (the marriage of) their daughters. (Translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud, Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 11, Number 2090)"
Narrated Abdullah ibn Abbas: "A virgin came to the Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) and mentioned that her father had married her against her will, so the Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) allowed her to exercise her choice. (Translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud, Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 11, Number 2091)"
Narrated Abdullah ibn Abbas: "The Prophet (peace_be_upon_him) said: A guardian has no concern with a woman previously married and has no husband, and an orphan girl (i.e. virgin) must be consulted, her silence being her acceptance. (Translation of Sunan Abu-Dawud, Marriage (Kitab Al-Nikah), Book 11, Number 2095)"
The above Noble Verse 4:19 and the Sayings of our beloved Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him clearly explain that according to Islam, whether the woman is virgin or not, her permission is a MUST. Her father or older brother can not force her into marriage as the Pagan Arabs and the Jews and Christians before Islam in the Middle East used to do; see Deuteronomy 25:5 in the Bible to see how women are forced into marriage.
You Said “I understand that the Qur’an has references to a time, now long ago, as does the Bible…why isn’t it updated? Should you be using those references to make a point that is relevant in today’s world?
Good Question
[It (the Qur’an) is simply a reminder to all the worlds.] (Saad 38:87)
The judgments of the Qur’an, a unique book of wisdom that Allah sent as a reminder to all the worlds, will apply until the Day of Judgment. However, some insincere people who make up excuses not to comply with its judgments unjustly assert that the Qur’an addresses only a certain period and only the Arab society of that time. According to their shallow outlook, some of its judgments can be ignored.
Given that the Qur’an is beyond all time and place, it is a reminder to all people about their eternal life and calls them to the right path, as we read: [It is certainly a reminder to you and to your people, and you will be questioned] (Az-Zukhruf 43:44), and therefore people will be called to account for their deeds in the Hereafter.
With its unique and superior wisdom, the information it conveys about the past and future, as well as its style, which removes forgetfulness and customary behavior, the Qur’an is a matchless book. This unique feature applies to all people who have been created since its revelation and who will be created until the Day of Judgment.
The following quotation from Badi` Az-Zaman Sa`id An-Nursi states that the Qur’an’s wisdom is eternal:
The people of truth and the exacting scholars say: “The Qur’an is an unending, inexhaustible treasury. In addition to submitting to and accepting its established and incontestable matters, each age also receives its share of its hidden truths, in the form of a supplement; it cannot trespass on the share of another which is concealed.”
An-Nursi, who also mentioned the Qur’an’s impact on people, describes this impact as follows:
This is the Qur’an’s youth. It preserves its freshness and youth every age as though newly revealed. In fact, the Qur’an has to have perpetual youth since, as a pre-eternal address, it addresses at once all the levels of mankind in every age.
The rulings and laws of the Qur’an are so firm and well-founded that they increase in strength as the centuries pass.
An-Nursi states further that the Qur’an is a matchless book that cannot be replaced by any other book:
The Qur’an by no means has—nor can have—any equal. Absolutely nothing can take the place of this greatest miracle.
Moreover
It shows its exalted, beautiful, and original style, which no one can imitate, although it pleases everyone. The passage of time does not cause its style to age; it always remains fresh and new. Its prose and word-order are so well-ordered that it is both elevated and pleasant. To soothsayers and other diviners of the Unseen, it displays its miraculousness in its extraordinary reports concerning the Unseen. To historians, it demonstrates its miraculousness by giving information concerning events of past ages, as well as those of the future, and of the Intermediate Realm, and of the Hereafter. To social and political scientists, it shows the miraculousness in its sacred principles... To those occupied with knowledge of Allah and cosmic truths, it shows the miraculousness of the sacred Divine truths in the Qur’an, or else it indicates the existence of that miraculousness. To the Sufis and saints, it shows the miraculousness in the hidden mysteries of its verses, which constantly rise and fall like waves in the sea of the Qur’an. And so on. To each of forty classes of men, it opens up a window and shows its miraculousness. The ordinary people even, who only listen to the Qur’an understanding a little of its meaning, confirm that it does not resemble any other book.
The primary responsibility of every person is to serve Allah. Only turning to Allah with a sincere heart and taking the Qur’an as a guide makes this possible. Every person must assume this responsibility and firmly embrace the Qur’an. In Surat Al-Hashr, Allah relates the Qur’an’s superiority and explains what a great responsibility it is to adopt the Qur’an as a guide:
[If We Had sent down this Qur’an onto a mountain, you would have seen it humbled, crushed to pieces out of fear of Allah. We make such examples for people so that hopefully they will reflect.] (Al-Hashr 59:21)
More Answer See that Blog under title The Scientific Miracles in the Noble Qur’an (Two parts).
You said “
You don’t care who started slavery cause you don’t want search and investgate the Truth . why you are so upset .No slavery in any islamic countries ..you don’t believe that .visit any islamic country and see
If that’s right what your false media always Tell about islam and muslims.
Again ! It was not Islam that started slavery, but it was Islam that ultimately ended it.
You asked How would you feel if Muslim Men were put on the bottom of the list as far as being eligible marriage material?
My Answer : that won’t be cause muslim men are the best men in that Earth
as muslim beautiful pure muslim women ~they will be always in the top.
You always welcome Anonymous .any question don’t hesitate to ask
we are here to answe you .
Take care
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